My name is Cody Sweeny, I am writing this blog for reasons I don’t yet know. I got the idea a while back to keep a journal. Well I am horrible about trying to keep up with a journal so I am trying the idea of a blog. I don’t want my blog to be all about my struggles and how much my life sucks, but to be much more than that. I want to show what God has been doing in my life, from the little things to the big things. First off: Last night I was up late and forgot to set my alarm for the morning. I woke up exactly at 6:55am, the same exact time my alarm is usually set(or after I hit the snooze). That was awesome! From my point of view that was a God thing.
If you go to my church Lakeside Fellowship(lakesidefellowship.com), you probably already know my biggest struggle. Porn and lust. Bear with my as I try to explain. I started off by telling 1 person. Matt, my Lake Ann cabin counselor. Then I told 400. Most of those I don’t even know, but many went to or go to my youth group. After that I went and told my church of 300 people that I know, and now I am telling the world(scary huh?). Society makes us(guys) believe that we can watch porn and stare at girls. Seriously you ask any normal guy if they like girls. Well obviously yes. The big thing about this is that many people see it as a cruse. God made Adam want Eve. Adam lusted after Eve. This is great if you are married, lusting after your partner, but not if you’re single. Girls if you are reading this don’t be creaped out, this is how guys are and it doesn’t help what you wear. “It’s good not to eat meat or to drink wine nor anything by which your brother stumbles, offended, or is made weak.”(Romans 14:21). Think about it, this verse isn’t just talking about food or drink. It is talking about anything! Anything! ANYTHING! okay, get the point? So enough of my rant. In all honesty it is my fault that I let me self fall into this sin. Mine alone, yes society might not help very much, but I am the one that looked. I saw one picture and I was hooked, hook line and sinker or stinker in my case. I should have had the courage to tell someone, but I didn’t. Now I am suffering the consequences of it. After seeing so much you only want more. It’s like chocolate. You eat one piece, and then a second, sooner or later you are on your 200 pieces. You are so sick of chocolate, that you see it, you know its bad, but you only want more. I am in the process of “cleansing my mind”. When I used look at a girl, or a sister in Christ I see them like the people I’ve seen in all those movies. My goal is to change that, I am now active in the Word. Now I am 4 days with out my drug. You’ll look at me and be like, “wait what?”. This is a huge accomplishment. Even though I struggle occasionally, I am able to talk to girls and sisters in Christ and I can see them as they are. Another human being and not just a tool. This might sound horrible but this is what porn does to you. Most guys are great liars and hiders. We can hide what is in our heart, can be good can be bad, mostly bad. I am very guilty of this very same thing. I am getting better, and most of all I am trusting God more then I am myself. I have an accountability partner, and a great church behind me. I have 15 guys, all throughout the world, that I can call on at any moment and they will talk to me and help me through any struggle. I encourage you, if you are a guy, to stuff your pride and be open and honest. I encourage you girls, no you don’t get out of this either, to be supportive of guys that struggle with this, and remember that modesty is key. I’m not saying to go back to ankle high dresses or something like that, but to be considerate of guys that might(probably are) struggling.
Thank you, Cody Sweeny